Personal: 30 years ...& our together

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To know you, is to LOVE you. --B.B. King

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I feel I have failed you on some level. In this world, we spend our days trying to live in the moment, but all too often rushing to the next thing. Wishing for another great adventure and always wanting more. I am guilty of this. And yet, feel some sort of pang in realizing that unlike in the "real world," I did NOT plan a huge birthday bash for you. It makes me sad.Officially today, you have graced this world for 30 amazing years. And I have been a part of almost 20 of them. Soon enough, we will have been together longer than we've been apart. It's a fact that makes me giddy just thinking about it. 

I wanted today to be special. More special than our other days. And trust me, I have more excuses reasons, as to why I couldn't pull it together and plan something sublime. But today, we will spend the majority of our day like any other: Together. In love.

...Funny how when I write that out, and really look at it, it suddenly...looks special. 

There won't be a big party, but we will make our own celebration. And the whole town will hear our laughter today. You are the best man I've ever known, my favorite person in the world, and the only one, I know, who is brave enough to walk this life with me. 

To your next 30 years. And the 30 after that. 

I am blessed to ever have known your love and will forever be smitten you. 

Happy 30th Birthday, J. 

Personal: My Best Friend's Wedding

At some point all my personal blogs started to become somewhat of a husband brag book. I don't know when or how it actually happened, but I do have a tremendously awesome husband and with all the man/husband-bashing there is in this world, it's nice to hear/read something about someone who LOVES, actually cherishes their husband. Recently I'd read an amazing blog post on this very subject by a good friend of mine (and amazing photographer!), Whitney Schey. And while she will have you awed by her masterfully written words and brilliantly thought-out blog, I feel the need to share just a simple story of why I think my husband is nothing short of a gift: The best man on the planet for me and the greatest man I've ever known. Here goes:

So my best friend just got married! It was the honestly the most exciting thing ever and I'd been looking forward to it since November 28^th, which, yes I care a lot, is when she got engaged! I couldn't wait to see her in a white dress, with flowers, and all gorgeous. It was just a dream for me to watch my best friend commit herself to another in love. I am a total sucker for weddings, but marriage has been the single greatest event in my life thus far. But I digress... When she told me Garrett had proposed, she wrote me a note: I really want you to be there for me when we get married next summer, so don't plan any vacas or go and get prego. Yea, well let's just say I didn't really think that would happen...but it did. IT DID!

So fast forward to her wedding. I'm 7 mos pregnant and suddenly realizing two very serious facts. 1, I was well into my third trimester and was dreading sticking out (literally) in her pictures. Or falling (physically) down the aisle in my 4” gold heels. And 2, as I was actually IN her wedding, I knew there was no way I'd be capable of snapping pictures. The latter was starting to depress me. If you know anything about me, you know that I have a slight problem NOT photographing life's big events. Make it fashionable, grogeous, or a wedding, and I'm in deep. I was trying to get a grip settling for random iPhone shots, when my husband offered to try and take pictures that captured the day for me so I didn't feel like I was missing out. Say what?! As awesome as this was, I wasn't sure if I could show him all that he needed to know in order to actually get the shots. I mean, this is no point-n-shoot, so there is a slight, er, large, learning curve to shooting entirely in manual. At Sunset. On the Beach. At the aperture I wanted. =) Yet, just the idea that he would lug around my bag(s), and keep my camera in hand at all times so I could later see Kim's day unfold made me swoon. It's probably the most selfless thing he's ever done. And while this may seem slightly silly, it was a huge deal to me.

After a fabulously long day at the wedding, at 2am back at our hotel room, J helped me put up my swollen feet in bed while I looked at the pictures he'd taken. I couldn't help but tear up at the sight of what he'd been able to capture! While I'd stayed behind and slowly waddled my way to the reception after the ceremony, Jason had followed Kim and Garrett at a distance and taken pictures of the two of them walking the beach, taking pictures, and having their wedding video filmed. It was like being given a small window into a day that I had been feeling like I'd miss. And how he was able to get so many in focus with manageable exposures made us both laugh. Between the totally black and totally white shots, the best ones were in-between. My husband cared enough to try and do what he knew I had dreaded missing. For that alone, he is the single greatest person on the planet.

Kimberly, your wedding helped remind me that I am blessed beyond measure! It makes me giddy like a child to see you in the same boat! I am so happy that you have found your soul-mate, your partner in life, and your one and only love. You will have the most amazing life and I feel so honored to have been even a small part of it! I love you Kimmy!!

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All credits for the following images must go to my amazing, first-time-photographer husband. My love, you rocked this out and I will always be grateful for these memories! Muah.

Me & Kimmy!

7mos and happy...although hoping not to stick out. Lol. As if.

Okay so I did take this quick shot before you walked out, but J did the rest. ;)

I love this!! (And the dramatically artistic capture of someone's front-row arm in the photo?? Priceless!)

Me and my amazing husband:

So I wanted to physically "see" you take pictures on the beach, but I couldn't make it down the hill. Jason's view was breathtaking of you two! And his "mistake" in the second photo was perfectly awesome. =)

I guess he held your bouquet so that your awesome videographer could keep shooting. =)

A gorgeous sunset on a perfect day!!

Your wedding photographer's awesome assistant took this of J and I. ♥

Garrett, you're awesome!

This is one of my very favorite photos.

And Kim, just in case you didn't see how I spent the reception...

Kimmy, I love you more than you know. I can't wait to see you again. Hugs and Love, Shanny

Personal: All Shades of Red

I knew as early as the 3rd grade. It was as clear as the blue sky. And although I have no idea how I knew, I knew. I felt it. And talked about it day in and day out. After keeping a picture of you folded inside the springs of my grad-school desk, practicing my name with yours in all my notebooks, and dialing your number for years only to hang up because of nerves, most people started to figure it out: I had a serious crush on you. One that wouldn't go away and one that I prayed nightly never would.

It took me years to turn your head...and while I'm not sure how I did it or what I did, I'm glad you looked. We have a history that is rare and a love that is rarer. I have no idea how I ended up so blessed, or how it's possibly that you still make me turn all shades of red when you walk into a room. But you do. You just always do.

Jason, you are my life. My Love. My everything-cheesy-in-a-love-song kinda man. I had no idea that at our 8 year anniversary, I'd be 8 months pregnant. This is SO SURREAL!! =) It's a new chapter that somewhat frightens me, if I'm being honest, but there is no one I'd rather walk this with than you. Thank you for making my life better than those years of dreaming what life would be like with you. Thank you for loving me more than I deserve.

Happy Anniversary, my love.

Our first "official" year together.

Cold Noses & Joy

This morning was cold...so snowy outside *finally!!* and I snuggled close to J and was thankful. For warmth, for my bed, for someone to snuggle with, and for my tiny family. My God is awesome. Thus is my life!

I peeked across the covers at the dogs in their beds all cozy and thought let's go play in the snow! Even though they were sleeping just a minute ago...both looked at me like I'd just said you get to eat steak tonight! =)

So we bundled up, left J in bed, and went outside. My little pups are always so good at putting things into perspective for me. I watched them play outside for as long as their paws allowed and the little noses could handle.

On the last calendar day of the year, these dogs have given me joy. I wish everyone nothing short of the same...

May you discover new adventures you never thought possible:

May you learn to really hear the quiet and take a moment to let it all in:

May you stare fear in the eye and take it on!

May you shake yourself off when bad things happen:

Take a moment...but pick yourslef up...

And keep moving forward...

Most of all may 2011 bring you health, wealth, LOVE, and most of all JOY!

Sieze today. Sieze tomorrow. Thank God for your life and revel in it!

Happy New Year.

xo

...like apple pie & 90210...

It's your day!! My best friend, it's your birthday. You're the single greatest thing that's ever happened to me. Ever. I wonder sometimes, how did I land you? I mean, I'm pretty freakin' great I think, but you...you're amazing. I think about how when we fight, we fight. But when we love, we love. It's never in-between for you and I. We always speak our minds. Say 100% percent whatever we're thinking. Wrong or right. Hurtful or not. The thing is...it's molded us into one awkwardly perfect couple. We go together. Fit together. Like a glove. Like apple pie and 90210. The C and the Blurd. And we work together. Every waking moment of our lives. And it's perfect. I wish everyone could know such love.

I think back to what made you so amazing in the first place. And when did I fall in love? Perhaps it was when

*you started sweating the first time we held hands at the roller-rink

*we snuck away at a halloween party to share hot-wings in the bathroom as kids

*you picked me up for our first date, with the biggest bouquet of flowers i'd ever seen

*you braided my hair in the back of a bus in the 7th grade

*or when you left me notes on my car in highschool

*you bought me my very first digital camera in the 12th grade...and told me I was an amazing photographer

*you parked once on top of a mountain...just so we could talk

*you wore my thumb ring on your ring finger because i was yours

*you wrote me a letter each day i was gone visiting colleges.

*you sat at all my games in high school...watching me sit the bench because of a loser coach

*or when you broke into my basement bedroom to decorate it while I was in class

*you ran out of gas on the highway and had to physically run a mile to the gas-station

*you ran out of gas for the 4th time since we'd met

*you told me my hair looked awful in platinum

*or when you paid for my haircut shortly after because I was broke

*you employed both of my brothers, creating a bond a girl only dreams her "boys" would share

*you listened for hours on the phone about how I was lonely in Cali with no friends

*you surprised me with a visit the day after i'd surprised you!

*you surprised me with a car for graduation and a smirk that said, babe, nothing is out of the question.

*or when you delivered a note from the "dogs" on my 24th birthday...and i cried

*it could be because you watch 90210 with me religiously

*or when I found out you were a snuggler

*you started setting the alarm for church

*you dressed up for halloween whenever i wanted

*you gave my 83 year old grandfather your undivided attention while he reminisced about life

*or the time you called me on the phone just to tell me you'd almost hit a bird while driving and were entirely upset about it

*you supported my every dream...then made them a reality

*you refused to buy me Kay pendants

*you listened to Lady Gaga on repeat before she was famous

*we ate rocket for dinner in Fiji

*you let me play with a kangaroo for hours in OZ

*or when you prayed with me the night I swore the cruise ship was going down in the Tasman sea

*you put up with three mattress exchanges when we switched beds...no one does that

*or when you comfort me when i'm sad for no reason...on my birthday(s)

*you came to watch me walk my first fashion-show

*you road a gondola with me on our 7th anniversary in Venice

*or when we had the worst anniversary dinner ever

*we rode a bus for 5 hours a day in Europe...just so we could stop in a place for five minutes and take pictures

*you made me laugh so hard i cried myself into coughing fits

*you walked into the room...

It's hard because there are so many things we've done, shared, seen, dreamed, and accomplished together...and I hate that I can't remember them all. All I know--that I'm more sure of than anything in this world--is that I love you. More than I can say. More than I can express, and more than you'll ever understand.

Hang on boy! Our lives are only going to get better.

I wish you the happiest birthday ever my love!

xo, Shanny